Monday, April 18, 2016

Killer Buzz Float Greatest Hits, Volume 1 - Kendall Grey


Your mother will never forgive you if you read this book ...
Letty Dillinger, Jinx Hardwick, Shades Armstrong, Toombs Badcock, and Rax Wrathbone are on a rock 'n' roll journey to stardom and COMPLETE sexual freedom. You should avoid tangling with them at all cost. The vile, base language and shocking, unholy sexual acts contained within these pages are grounds for arrest in 52 countries and caning in twelve others (and for you masochistic kinksters who enjoy that sort of thing, they use wet, limp celery instead of those rattan things, just to piss you off). The American Sexcapades Society found that 4 out of 5 Hard Rock Harlots readers who lived to tell about the book were unfit to return to proper society upon finishing. Forget about going to work the next day (Unless you work at a sewage treatment plant--then you might be okay.). Following a ferocious public outcry and repeated (failed) attempts at banning the books, several states set up padded shelters and edible straight jackets for the unfortunate Hard Rock Harlots survivors who can't shake the nightmares of giant gonads chasing them with 3-headed industrial-strength sprinklers. 

Who knew reading could be so damaging to one's health? 

IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE, DO NOT READ THIS BOOK! 

KILLER BUZZ FLOAT: Greatest Hits, Volume 1 features the first three books in Kendall Grey's Hard Rock Harlots series, originally published in 2013. This series contains EXTREMELY graphic sexual content (DUH!) and is not suitable for readers under the age of 18. Includes masochism, MM, menage, pegging, DP, extreme body modification, Domination, submission, lots of flying bodily fluids, A2M, alcohol abuse, prostitution, cheating, and more. Seriously, if any of the above is the least bit off-putting, please proceed with caution!


Because KILLER BUZZ FLOAT is a Kindle Countdown deal, the sale price will start at $.99 and go up every day, so snap up this anthology NOW!

Kindle Unlimited subscribers can grab the book for FREE!

For non-KU subscribers:
April 18 — $.99
April 19 — $1.99
April 20 — $2.99
April 21— $3.99
April 22 — $4.99 (regular price)

Ready to take the plunge and dive into this sassy piece of purple prose? DO IT!







And if you read KILLER BUZZ FLOAT and need more from this band of sexy beasts, be sure to check out “Love Notes,” ROCK, and “Home."


Love Notes (A Hard Rock Harlots B-Side short story)










ROCK (Book 4 in the Hard Rock Harlots series)



“Home” (A Hard Rock Harlots B-Side) is FREE and only available on Wattpad at https://www.wattpad.com/story/65978353-home

Now go forth, and get your ROCK on!

#LongLiveTheRock
#MakeArtNotHousePayments
#KillerBuzzFloat


Monday, March 28, 2016

Stone Guardians: Obsidian by Author Ellie Potts


Title: Stone Guardians: Obsidian
Author: Ellie Potts
Genre: Paranormal Romance
Hosted by: Lady Amber’s PR


Blurb: This is a different take on the vampire mythos.
Long before man there were Stone Guardians, a race of immortal warriors who sat beside Goddess. Isobel is different, she is an illegal bound servant. Not human or Guardian, she is vampire. Last of her kind, kept hidden by her Guardian master Vilem of the Obsidian Clan. Youngest son to Ivy who is responsible for the uprising that tore the Stone Guardians into two factions. One who still worship the Goddess, and the other who defies her.
Isobel has seen a lot throughout her many years with Vilem. She has learned with great minds, taught by teachers who live in history books. But she is truly happy when she sings. Now she is the head singer of the local rock band À La Mode. Her band consist of her closest friends, who are fourth generation Guardians. As uninvited visitors show up and threaten Isobel’s life. She has to play the good little Guardian while her world unwinds.

Ellie Potts is a self-published multi-genre writer. She loves everything nerdy like dressing for pirate and renaissance faires, Steampunk, playing video games, planning to survive a zombie apocalypse, being a Whovian, Browncoat, Star Wars addict, and collector of arcane knowledge. She grew up in Merced County where most of her stories and books take place. She now lives in Tulare County with her husband, an attack Bugg, Darth Turtle, two spoiled goats, and a bunch of creepy chickens.  
Author Links:
Buy Links: Amazon: http://amzn.to/1Se07zT
Chapter 1
Isobel gripped the microphone and let the rhythm of the music take over. On cue, her mouth opened and she began to sing; softly at first then louder as the drums and the bass guitar came in. She opened her eyes and heard the people nearest the stage gasp. It was the white contacts, but they weren’t part of her overall costume. The powdered oversized hairdo and  heavy make-up with pink accents plus the tight, hot pink, silk, brocade bodice, the matching short pannier  skirt with fringe and matching heels all fit her French rock band À La Mode’s look.
Their music was gothic rock with a touch of 70’s glam. As Isobel sang, she made love to the microphone. People left their shows excited and turned on, which added to the vibe of the crowd. She shut out the world and released all of her pain and agony when she sang. Toby played drums behind her, wearing his own oversized wig and a pair of tight pants. His body was powdered and adorned with piercings and tattoos.  On her left was Johnny who played guitar and on her right was Jenny, Johnny’s twin, who played bass. Both dressed in high French eighteenth-century fashion with a modern twist.
When the set was done, Toby got up and went to Isobel, holding out his hand. She gave a slight curtsy, took his hand, and bounded off the stage followed by the twins. Their groupies ooohed and aahed around them as they made their way to the bar.
“Madame,” Toby said, pulling out the barstool.
“Merci, mon cher,” she replied, sitting down.
“Isobel,” a man called, making her turn.  “Will you take a picture with me?”
She looked him over. He was dressed in the usual Goth attire; black and more black. “Why, yes,” she replied and got up from the stool.  He pulled her close, and she put on a fake smile as he snapped a selfie.
She kissed his cheeks then shooed him away. Other fans began asking her questions, mostly about the group’s eyes. The twins had burnt orange colored eyes, and Toby’s were sky blue. Eyes of their family line. When Isobel left the house she had to wear her silver contacts to cover her brown eyes. She smiled, she laughed, and she teased them sensually, as was her way.  Finally, she sat at the bar. Toby removed the wig.
“The usual?” Roy the bartender asked.
They all nodded.
“You didn’t have to take that picture,” Jenny said.
“Oh, but did you see his ruffles?” she smiled and tried to hide her teeth as much as possible. She had used much of the energy she had, and she was hungry. “I’ll be back. I need to use the restroom.”
“I’ll go,” Jenny said.
“No, it’s okay. I need to call Vilem anyway.”
Roy set down a pitcher and four glasses. She managed to make it to the bathroom on legs that didn’t feel steady. Something was off. She flipped down the toilet seat and dug out the vials hiding in her bodice. She usually only needed one but pulled out both; tonight, she needed a double shot. She popped the cork, tilted the vial, and let the warm red liquid slide down her throat. The copper essence filled her senses.  
She finished the one then looked at the other vial. She popped the top and slammed it back as if taking a shot. Her energy returned quickly, but something was still wrong. She looked at the stall, not really thinking as she looked over the graffiti: Samantha was here, John’s a dick, and her favorite, I love bacon.
She flushed the toilet and went to the sinks. A trickle of blood had run down the side of her mouth. She licked at it quickly before anyone could see.
She threw the empty vials in the trash and washed her hands. She left the bathroom and made her way back to her friends. They were discussing their playlist for tomorrow.
“How is Vilem?” Toby asked as she took her seat.
“Being Vilem.”
“My father would flay me if I called him by his given name,” Johnny said.
“Vilem never seems to mind,” Jenny said.
Toby poured her a beer. She took her glass and guzzled the drink. “Always the lady,” Toby said. “You all right?”
“I’m fine.”
Roy came back with the bar phone. “Izzy, your father is on the phone.”
“You didn’t bring your phone?” Toby asked.
“I forgot,” she said and took the phone. “Father?” She listened quietly. “I forgot it. I know. Yes.”
“Well, what did your father want?” Jenny asked.
“You are the only girl I know who hates cell phones,” Johnny said.
“Vilem wants me home. He received word of relatives coming to visit.”
Toby choked on his beer. She looked at him as he cleaned himself with a napkin. She looked at the twins; their eyes were wide staring at her.
“What?” she finally asked.
“You do know that your relatives don’t believe in our way.”
She shook her head. “Vilem has told me very little of our relatives.”
“You need to have him tell you about them before we say anything more.” Jenny put her cup down, her hand shaking slightly.  She was scared. Izzy had known them for over one hundred years, and Jenny only shook when she was frightened.
“Why are you scared?”
Jenny shot her daggers. “I am not scared. I am a guardian.”
“Look, let us enjoy the night,” Toby said.
“Excuse me,” a man said, and they all turned to look at him. He was tall and lean and had muscles where they counted. He wore a tight pair of pants and a loose fitting shirt. “Toby, I am a huge fan. I want to buy you a drink.”
“I would love that. And what is your name?”
“Jorge,” he said, clearly nervous.
“Well, Jorge, sit here next to me and let us have that drink.” Toby spewed sexual mojo causing Isobel to roll her eyes and turn back to her drink.
“We may have another problem,” Johnny said, looking towards the door.
Izzy closed her eyes. She had sensed the darkness as it came in. Blood, sex, frustration, and anger; most of the dark guardians wore the scent as if it was their only skin. She sat straight up on her stool. She knew who had come in even before looking. He was heading straight for her. Aengus always walked with a purpose. He had an air about him, as if he owned everything and everyone in his path.  He wanted to own her. His shoulder length black hair made his skin luminous, which made his maroon eyes glow with evil darkness.   
He was closely followed by his cronies. All wore black, had ebony colored hair and wore white makeup.  They looked the part of traditional vampires, but they were far more sinister. All of them, except for one, were guardians, dark stone guardians at that. They lived only on human blood.
All stone guardians lived off of blood but the light guardians, who still lived by the Goddess, consumed only animal blood. Dark stone guardians defied the Goddess and drank human blood, since she valued them more than any other creature. Human blood had made them dangerous and a bit insane throughout the years, and with each generation, it seemed to get worse.
Aengus stopped in front of her. “I missed your band. I apologize.”
“Accepted, now please leave,” she said.
“It is moon. I am free and bound to court you. Will you accept my offer?” He leaned in. The darkness that clung to him always called to something deep inside her. Yet she could not stand the man.
“Again, I will pass. You might want to court one of your own kind.”
“But you are my kind,” he bent down, whispering against her ear. “I know you feel it. I have seen it in your eyes.  Be my bride.  I will show you such pleasures, and you will never look back.”
“No thank you,” she said.
“I am then calling you to circle,” he said, pulling away. “I have talked to the council. You are expected in an hour, since you did not accept my proposal.” He turned and left with his group.
Izzy stared after him. “Trouble,” she said, her French accent heavy as the others stared at her. What they did not know was that she was speaking to Vilem.
Fear bit into her. She had opened the tie to Vilem. Aengus has made a blood challenge.  In an hour, she whispered to him in her head. She looked around at her friends.
“It is okay to be frightened,” Jenny said.
“I would have wet myself,” Johnny said.
“Plead to the council,” Toby said, taking her hands. “He has no reason to call you into challenge. Plead to the council.”
“We should get going,” she said, still in shock. She could feel the feelings of others, anger and more fear.  She looked around the bar and listened to the beating hearts. The smell of blood in their veins called to her.  
Humans. They had no idea how easy they had it. She had been alive for over six hundred years. Tobias, from what she remembered, was two hundred years younger than her. The twins were going on four hundred years old. However, they weren’t the same. He was a fourth generation guardian, and she was an abomination, or rather, a vampire.

Friday, March 25, 2016

AJ Lape's Foolproof!

Title:  Foolproof
Author:  A.J. Lape
Series:  The Darcy Walker Series, Book 5
Genre:  YA Mystery, Humor & Comedy
Cover Designer:  ’68 Zombie Comics
Release Date:  March 15, 2016
 Add to Goodreads TBR
Jon Bradshaw needs a girlfriend stat. When he convinces Darcy Walker to be his wingman at a speed-dating event, one debacle leads to another, and before you know it, they’re the proud new owners of a dead body. Problem is, the body has a tie to Darcy…making her a person of interest in a murder.

Things quickly jump from bad to worse when someone hijacks the name of Darcy’s alter ego, framing “Jester” in a Hitchcock-like blend of crimes that leaves her head spinning.

In FOOLPROOF, Darcy battles an adversary who tests her IQ while she navigates the daunting worries of a high school senior. Add on the emotional fallout of her latest caper, a cop breathing down her neck, and a hot but stubborn boyfriend, and she’s at her wit’s end.

Can she find her zen and unmask the real murderer? Or get used to a life of prison orange?
Amazon: US I UK I AU I CA
 Welcome to Darcyville 
The Amazon bestselling Darcy Walker Series has been compared to Veronica Mars meets Stephanie Plum meets The Black List. All novels are written as stand-alone novels, but a backstory is woven into each book. Reading order is Grade A Stupid, No Brainer, 100 Proof Stud, DEFCON Darcy & Foolproof.

Clean mature YA series for ages 13 and up due to graphic crime scenes.

What reviewers are saying


Darcy reminded me of a teenage Stephanie Plum. - Bex 'N' Books, Justine


"Defcon Darcy is my favorite in the series, but not only that, it is my favorite YA novel to date. A.J has the perfect voice to channel the perfect teen for pure entertainment, and to see it all come alive in this book was total joy!" - Lila Rose, USA Today Bestselling author of the Hawks Motorcycle Club Series.

"A. J. Lape has truly established herself as not only an extremely talented, 5-star mystery writer, but also a true master of romantic, gut-wrenching novel writing. I will go on record saying this book will knock any Nicholas Sparks book out of the water." - Julie Cassar, Amazon Bestselling Author of the Ruby Blue Series.

The way she brings her characters to life really makes you feel as if you know them personally -Amazon Reviewer

Her brand of justification is awesome. She makes everything make so much sense in a warped way - Sheri Spell, Two Bibliophiles Guides to Seriously Awesome Books



Book 1
AN AMAZON #1 BESTSELLER IN TEENS MYSTERIES & THRILLERS SPIES AND DETECTIVE STORIES! 

Fifteen years ago, Darcy Walker's parents thought it was a good idea to give her a unique name: Darcy, meaning "dark walker." Whether that was a stroke of genius or stroke of stupid, they definitely nailed the irony. She lacks direction, her grades stink despite a high IQ, she's boringly average--although flirting admirers claim otherwise--and God help her, she's infatuated with a bad-boy.

A bad-boy that her hottie best friend, Dylan, wishes would get acquainted with his fist.

And, oh yeah, there's that tattoo that was a royally stupid idea.

With her life spiraling out of control, everything changes when she skips class and finds a dead body...in fact, it gets worse. It jump starts Darcy's inner-verb, and her brain hardwired for action gets caught up in a situation she can’t let go.

Set in the fictional Cincinnati town of Valley, Ohio, Darcy falls into a world of threats, violence, and gangland exploits chasing down every clue to finger the murderer. When a fellow misfit is arrested for the crime, Darcy goes from zero-to-sixty trying to clear his name--constructing aliases, breaking the law, everything that makes perfect sense to her but reeks of Grade A Stupid to everyone else.

Trouble is...will she live to see sixteen?


Book 2
Available HERE
AN AMAZON #1 BESTSELLER IN TEENS MYSTERIES & THRILLERS SPIES AND DETECTIVE STORIES! 

Two weeks before junior year, Darcy hops a plane to Orlando for a little R&R with her best friend Dylan and his family. Fresh off the heels of solving three murders in Valley, Darcy plans to sit back and enjoy the vacation capital of the world…maybe if you're a noun. Darcy Walker, however, is nothing but verb.

Before her feet hit the Orlando soil, she's meddling in the disappearance of a five-year-old boy who vanished six months earlier.

With authorities still no closer to solving the case, Darcy is shanghaied by her impulsivity and runs headlong into that proverbial burning building, convinced she can bring him home.

She travels down a road that not only follows this missing child but branches off into the corrupt and sinister world of mob activity when she tampers in a case on which Dylan's detective grandfather is working.

After a near disastrous midnight meeting in a warehouse and a date with a mechanical bull, Darcy realizes she might've bitten off more than she can chew. Add the boiling flirtationship with her best friend and the appearance of his romantic rival, and she is in over her head.

Will she survive a life of flirting with death too easily? Or will her flirtationship with Dylan become the actual death of her instead?

For a girl with a habit of finding dead bodies, No Brainer gives Darcy Walker more of the same…surprising twists and turns…and running for her life.


Book 3
Available HERE
AN AMAZON #1 BESTSELLER IN TEENS MYSTERIES & THRILLERS SPIES AND DETECTIVE STORIES! 

Sometimes life smacks you right in the kisser with a whole lot of ohhhh craaaaap.

Just ask Darcy Walker.

100 Proof Stud picks up four months after No Brainer's cliffhanger ending, and Darcy discovers the aftermath pales in comparison to the crisis her heart is in. All of a sudden it's raining men, and this teenage heroine’s personal life turns her inside out.

Before she can sort out her feelings, she chases a spray-painting vandal and stumbles upon a case of identity theft right in her own backyard. Darcy jumps into the fray headfirst to prove she can hang with the big boys.

But it’s not just to hang…nope, she’s chasing reward money.

Tapping her band of misfit brothers for help, she turns Valley upside down trying to unearth the criminals. Problem is, the cloak and dagger goes high-octane, and she raises the bar on “crazy" in the process.

Bullets ring out…dead bodies appear…and Darcy rubs shoulders with the ultimate sociopath. In the midst of murder and mayhem, will she finally follow her heart or build a fortress of lies around it? Will she even get the chance?

 Book 4
Available HERE
Fisher Stanton, Valley High School's Nantucket wannabe, has a cheating girlfriend. When he hires Darcy Walker to chase her to a local club, in true Darcy fashion she stumbles upon a dead body. Thing is, this body has secrets...and Darcy's mysterious friend, Jaws, and the reporter, Tito Westbrook, have a vested interest. Both enlist Darcy to find the person responsible who has eluded them for years, but Darcy doesn't solve crimes for free anymore--especially where Jaws is concerned. Knowing Darcy's Achilles heel, Jaws blackmails Darcy into working for him.

In a true test of wills, Darcy and Jaws battle head-to-head--Jaws needs Darcy to help him end a bitter grudge war; Darcy needs Jaws to divulge the mystery surrounding her mother's death. Haunted by a past that shapes her present, Darcy will stop at nothing to get answers. Even if it means breaking the law and being disloyal to her new boyfriend, Dylan Taylor, in the process.

DEFCON DARCY gives Darcy's demons a name and ties up loose ends that make Darcy into the verb that she is. What she thinks she knows as truth, isn't. What she wishes wasn't true...is.

The problem is, when your life goes DEFCON 1, not everyone lives to tell about it.

A.J. Lape is the author of the Darcy Walker Series which has stayed on Amazon's teen's mysteries and thrillers bestseller's lists since its debut in 2012. She lives in Cincinnati with her husband, two daughters, an ADD dog, a spoiled hamster, and an unapologetic and unrepentant addiction to Coca-Cola--plus a lifelong love affair with bacon she has no plans to sever.

A graduate of Morehead State University with a Master's degree in Communications, she's a PI wannabe and recently joined the Citizen's Police Academy in her hometown but daily stops crime and kills bad people through the fictional ADHD character of Darcy Walker.

If the FBI ever checks her computer, she'll be wearing prison-orange due to the graphic and disgusting "wiki" articles she looks up...all in the name of career research, of course.